solnet | Nothing says accidental network post like pocket dialing.

[ At first, it's all black, just the loud, raspy sound of cotton against a receiver, until the image is just of dim blue interrupted by bars of fuzzy black as the rasping cuts out. Having apparently accidentally activated his phone while extracting it from his hoodie's pocket, Sans swings himself upright with the sort of hollowed-out and unreceptive expression that belongs to those who just woke up far earlier than intended.

He had pulled his phone from his pocket because it was digging into his hip. Now? He blearily gazes down on it like it offended him down to his bones. Several ways to Sunday. Not that he has much of a right to complain; of those who were snatched away for a few days under inexplicable circumstances, Sans was perhaps the last to return, crashed for a few hours, and once his phone had recharged itself on the ambient free energy transfer from the generator, a few careless movements had activated it.

It's not like anybody woke him. In any case, it's only 10:00 PM or so, and whatever ruined timepiece makes up his "internal clock" is surely totally messed up by now.

He tosses the phone aside. From its now awkward, ceiling-fixed angle, it still picks up his staggering silhouette shuffling away in a corner of the view screen. ]

Heh. Runnin' on empty. You want anything?

[ It's debatable if anyone answers, at least, in his room anyway. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Zuko is simultaneously relieved and incredibly annoyed. She considers responding with text so she doesn't snap at him, but you know what? She thinks it's warranted.]

Did you even let anyone know you were back?

[ It sure is warranted. She can be as sharp as he deserves, but Sans still looks like he could use some strong coffee (or a stiffer drink) when he grins down at his phone. ]

Guess I just saved myself the trouble.

[ He isn't even contrite, what a jerk. ...But if he spares the puns with her, that's less MERCY than the fact that most of them get lost in translation. ]

Wasn't even gone that long, c'mon. It was, what. A day? I've had longer naps.

[Don't grin at her like that.]

Try three days. No one could find you.

Where were you?

[ Three days? That prompts a low whistle through his teeth.

But good luck getting this grin off his face, it's stuck that way. Cautionary tale of why you shouldn't make funny faces for too long. ]

Not here. Some kinda-- [ He holds up a hand to make airquotes, or at least, half of them. ] "resort". Lotta weirdos, nothin' dangerous.

Still ain't so sure I believe it happened, myself. It was a real trip.

Are you saying you went on an actual vacation?

Even I gotta admit, that's a better practical joke than I could'a come up with. More elaborate, too.

[ There might be some people who can relate with the idea that coming back from vacation can leave you more tired than you were when you departed for it, but this is just ridiculous. ]

Jokes are supposed to be funny.

[Oh wait, hang on. What was it Frisk said?]

Anyway, I'm supposed to tell you, "You're going tibia big trouble."

[Was that right? Well, she tried.]

[ Now that prompts some unguarded fondness for a moment or two. ]

Heh heh, geez, that kid.

[ He lifts his shoulders, shrugging again. ]

I'll, uh. Make it up to 'em. Anything happen?

Besides you worrying everyone?

No, nothing out of the ordinary for this place.

You're exaggerating, c'mon. Nothin' happened, it's fine. Take it easy, Zuko.

[ That is about as inoffensive as telling an upset person to chill out.

Which is to say, not at all. ]

I'm not exaggerating, and it's not fine.

I know it's not your fault but it still happened.

Look, that stuff that happened in March was a heckova lot worse.

Letting it get to us is probably what the Queen wants or something.

Really? That's the argument you're going with?

[Sans you're just making this worse.]

Sure.

...So I wasn't around for few days. I'm back now, right?

And if we're gonna talk about something that's actually important: Nobody died, so if you don't mind, I'll save the walkin' around like we're in mourning for when someone actually bites the dust.

No one's in mourning. Except maybe for the people skills I thought you had.

We thought you could be dead. We spent three days looking for you. And you just want to laugh it off like it's dumb for anyone to be worried in the first place.

Uh... Relax, pal.

I was just kidding.

That's exactly the problem!

[ He drags his palm over the dome of his skull with a dry rasp. ]

Yeah, well, ever think about how much of a non-issue this is? Learn to take a joke, buddy, geez.

It's over. It's fine, and all I want is a cold one and about, uh, maybe 10 hours of sleep. That ok with you?

No.

[Okay, yes, now she's just being contrary.]

[ Wh--

Oh ok, he sees what's up. He winks at her. ]

Good thing you ain't my boss, huh?

Edited (Fuck you autocorrect) 2016-07-20 19:13 (UTC)

Yeah, good thing. I'd never tolerate this if I were.

I get it, I get it. You're, uh. Really disciplined. You expect a certain... professionalism, right? Stuff I just ain't.

All I'm sayin' is your concern's touching but, uh, you've got more important stuff to worry about.

The wellbeing of everyone here is important.

[Most people wouldn't express that sentiment so angrily, but damnit Sans, everyone means everyone.]

[ Does she feel that way about Flowey? If she knew what he's done, what he's capable of, what he is? It's noble, but rather than disagree with her, Sans will go the path of least resistance. ]

Yeah, guess you've gotta point.

[Zuko has not yet had the pleasure of interacting with Flowey.]

I don't care if you're "unprofessional." As long as you keep that in mind.

[Video]

justribbing - 2016-07-22 17:30 (UTC) - Expand