Minako "Fuck Pants" Arisato (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
wildcardpotential) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
solnet2016-08-26 02:49 pm
wildcardpotential) wrote in solnet2016-08-26 02:49 pm
[Video]- So when you think it really might come to blows
(ooc: content warning for violence, suicidal ideation, nihilism, consent issues, verbal abuse, self-hatred)
[Some of you may have noticed that Minako disappeared from her usual routine starting early in the morning of the 26th. Her things were not left behind this time, though, and she isn't gone for too long.
About midday, a video gets posted to the network. The image flicks on as someone appears to be propping the phone up on various jury-rigged objects. At first, all you can see is the torso of a Gekkoukan school uniform, and some auburn hair.
Then, the set-up crew bends down to show her face. Her almost perfect copy of Minako's face, but for the glowing yellow eyes and the very wrong smile. It's cruel and hollow, and her wild hair frames around her face and makes her look even more untamed.]
Hellooooo castle residents!
[She backs away with a familiar grace, made ironic in her drama of it, to reveal what she meant to film- Minako, crumpled on the ground, curled to show her back to the camera.]
I know plenty of you recognize this face, [She points at herself] but none of you really know us.
[She nudges Minako with a foot, reaching down to pull her up to a sitting position by her ponytail.]
Oh she may look and act all sweet and innocent and open, I've watched her do it all month. I thought maybe she would be smart enough to know, seeing me, that that wouldn't fly for long. Tch. I'm here to make sure all of you know how much of a lie that is. And to see what happens to liars if they don't repent. Right, self?
[Now forced to sit, it's clear Minako has been kicked around a bit already. Her face is dirty and scraped. The shadow releases her once it's sure she's sitting and pets her hair in mock sympathy.]
That pretty face hides so many dark secrets, [She tuts and brushes her fingers over Minako's face... before slapping her, hard. Minako grunts but doesn't otherwise react. She knows that will make it worse.] She didn't want any of you to know that we're dead, at first. That would make it so easy to for you all to find out how much she wanted to die!
[The shadow laughs, clutching her belly and throwing back her head. This is the funniest shit she's ever heard. Minako starts to react, eyebrows knitting, and lips moving, and the shadow rounds on her with a fury that seems so far beyond Minako... but at the same time so very believable.]
You know it's still true! That death acceptance stuff was just bullshit! We were this close to taking that peaceful ending, and you had to go and pretend to be noble! All of us, your precious friends, we could have rested in peace! You wanted it so badly you could taste the steel of our gun! Just kill Ryoji, by our hand, kill our own connection to this Tartarus bullshit and die as one of humanity!
But no. You couldn't give up what made you special. What made you forget that we are nothing and no-one!. Not even SEES ever saw the real you, and that is a fact!
[She's practically spitting now, leaning down over Minako, who is wincing at the words, unable to keep herself stoic. She's shaking, too, if the camera will catch that. Tears are starting to form in her eyes, but they don't fall just yet.]
Yeah, I knew you didn't have a snappy retort for that one. You hail them up in your soul like they saved you from your despair, like they taught you the meaning of friendship and who you really are, and how to define yourself... [She leans in close to stage whisper right in Minako's ear.] How to say 'no'.
[Minako really flinches that time and her shadow laughs again, pushing her back down to the floor. It isn't clear what part of the castle they're even in, so it would be hard to go finding them, with how dangerous it is right now.]
Ah but that was a hard lesson to learn! We're still learning it! Saying 'no' means people might not like us all the time and that just can't do for our fragile little ego! We may have decided who we are but we still rely on the approval of others to have self-worth, don't we? We are so desperately, endlessly lonely that we would give up everything, to anyone who asked for it! Not that everything we are isn't worthless, fake, pretend...
[The shadow skips around her prone self to the front, where a partially-covered bandage reveals a fresh injury. The shadow aims a perfect kick, and Minako screams. Blood starts to seep through the bandage.]
Aww, the truth hurts, doesn't it, little self? It would hurt less if you could admit it on your own! What else do your stupid little friends need to know about you?
[The shadow watches Minako crumple and clutch at herself, almost bored. Such a stark contrast to her laughter from earlier.]
You really are enjoying this though, aren't you? Such a release, to give yourself over to pain and pathetic sobbing. Let me do all the hard work for you of being honest, airing out our dirty laundry. So selfish! [She steps on Minako's ribs. She wants to hurt her more, but if she focuses on the wound too much, she might pass out, and that would ruin all the fun.] It's so comforting to let the hurt and the pain take over, let that be your payment for being a horrible, selfish, empty thing! You don't have to put in any effort for that! Right?
[She rolls Minako over with her foot, making her face the camera, and pokes her face with a foot.]
You torture yourself so much for the sake of "atoning" for what you are, but you know that's just more self-indulgent, selfish dog shit. [Minako groans.] Hmph. At least you sort of admit to that one. Good girl. You really do just love suffering, don't you? Why else would you give up a happy ending for the sake of being the beloved martyr? For the sake of being chewed on by humanity's collective suicide for the rest of forever?
You are pathetically desperate to be special. Just give up! We're nothing. We're no-one. We're a mirror that others see themselves in. Clay to be molded exactly how they want us so that we don't feel so empty inside. Let the others fill us up. Use them so that we don't hate ourself, right? Ugh. Take, take, take. Selfish cunt.
I don't even know what to say to you anymore. But there has to be something more...
[She lifts a finger to her chin, tapping away in a mockery of Minako's thinking face. Then she turns to address the camera again, winking and grinning.]
I want to make sure all of you are witnessing this. It is very important to me that my dear self finally opens up and is honest about all of our faults. She's very protective of them, you know. So controlled. Such a perfect actress. Please, video or call or text in with your questions you're all dying to know and I'll make sure she doesn't keep any more secrets from you! You deserve better, after all, putting up with her and being her "friends"!
She would do anything for any of you! Just to make sure you'd throw her a little affection bone once in awhile! Isn't that sweet? Isn't that. Just. So. Selfless!
[She kicks Minako again, and blood starts to really pool out of her bandage onto the floor. There are obvious tear tracks on her face when the shadow lifts her up again, holding her shoulders to aim her at the camera.]
Come on, come ask all of Minako! Not just the pathetic perfect hero she pretends to be!
[Some of you may have noticed that Minako disappeared from her usual routine starting early in the morning of the 26th. Her things were not left behind this time, though, and she isn't gone for too long.
About midday, a video gets posted to the network. The image flicks on as someone appears to be propping the phone up on various jury-rigged objects. At first, all you can see is the torso of a Gekkoukan school uniform, and some auburn hair.
Then, the set-up crew bends down to show her face. Her almost perfect copy of Minako's face, but for the glowing yellow eyes and the very wrong smile. It's cruel and hollow, and her wild hair frames around her face and makes her look even more untamed.]
Hellooooo castle residents!
[She backs away with a familiar grace, made ironic in her drama of it, to reveal what she meant to film- Minako, crumpled on the ground, curled to show her back to the camera.]
I know plenty of you recognize this face, [She points at herself] but none of you really know us.
[She nudges Minako with a foot, reaching down to pull her up to a sitting position by her ponytail.]
Oh she may look and act all sweet and innocent and open, I've watched her do it all month. I thought maybe she would be smart enough to know, seeing me, that that wouldn't fly for long. Tch. I'm here to make sure all of you know how much of a lie that is. And to see what happens to liars if they don't repent. Right, self?
[Now forced to sit, it's clear Minako has been kicked around a bit already. Her face is dirty and scraped. The shadow releases her once it's sure she's sitting and pets her hair in mock sympathy.]
That pretty face hides so many dark secrets, [She tuts and brushes her fingers over Minako's face... before slapping her, hard. Minako grunts but doesn't otherwise react. She knows that will make it worse.] She didn't want any of you to know that we're dead, at first. That would make it so easy to for you all to find out how much she wanted to die!
[The shadow laughs, clutching her belly and throwing back her head. This is the funniest shit she's ever heard. Minako starts to react, eyebrows knitting, and lips moving, and the shadow rounds on her with a fury that seems so far beyond Minako... but at the same time so very believable.]
You know it's still true! That death acceptance stuff was just bullshit! We were this close to taking that peaceful ending, and you had to go and pretend to be noble! All of us, your precious friends, we could have rested in peace! You wanted it so badly you could taste the steel of our gun! Just kill Ryoji, by our hand, kill our own connection to this Tartarus bullshit and die as one of humanity!
But no. You couldn't give up what made you special. What made you forget that we are nothing and no-one!. Not even SEES ever saw the real you, and that is a fact!
[She's practically spitting now, leaning down over Minako, who is wincing at the words, unable to keep herself stoic. She's shaking, too, if the camera will catch that. Tears are starting to form in her eyes, but they don't fall just yet.]
Yeah, I knew you didn't have a snappy retort for that one. You hail them up in your soul like they saved you from your despair, like they taught you the meaning of friendship and who you really are, and how to define yourself... [She leans in close to stage whisper right in Minako's ear.] How to say 'no'.
[Minako really flinches that time and her shadow laughs again, pushing her back down to the floor. It isn't clear what part of the castle they're even in, so it would be hard to go finding them, with how dangerous it is right now.]
Ah but that was a hard lesson to learn! We're still learning it! Saying 'no' means people might not like us all the time and that just can't do for our fragile little ego! We may have decided who we are but we still rely on the approval of others to have self-worth, don't we? We are so desperately, endlessly lonely that we would give up everything, to anyone who asked for it! Not that everything we are isn't worthless, fake, pretend...
[The shadow skips around her prone self to the front, where a partially-covered bandage reveals a fresh injury. The shadow aims a perfect kick, and Minako screams. Blood starts to seep through the bandage.]
Aww, the truth hurts, doesn't it, little self? It would hurt less if you could admit it on your own! What else do your stupid little friends need to know about you?
[The shadow watches Minako crumple and clutch at herself, almost bored. Such a stark contrast to her laughter from earlier.]
You really are enjoying this though, aren't you? Such a release, to give yourself over to pain and pathetic sobbing. Let me do all the hard work for you of being honest, airing out our dirty laundry. So selfish! [She steps on Minako's ribs. She wants to hurt her more, but if she focuses on the wound too much, she might pass out, and that would ruin all the fun.] It's so comforting to let the hurt and the pain take over, let that be your payment for being a horrible, selfish, empty thing! You don't have to put in any effort for that! Right?
[She rolls Minako over with her foot, making her face the camera, and pokes her face with a foot.]
You torture yourself so much for the sake of "atoning" for what you are, but you know that's just more self-indulgent, selfish dog shit. [Minako groans.] Hmph. At least you sort of admit to that one. Good girl. You really do just love suffering, don't you? Why else would you give up a happy ending for the sake of being the beloved martyr? For the sake of being chewed on by humanity's collective suicide for the rest of forever?
You are pathetically desperate to be special. Just give up! We're nothing. We're no-one. We're a mirror that others see themselves in. Clay to be molded exactly how they want us so that we don't feel so empty inside. Let the others fill us up. Use them so that we don't hate ourself, right? Ugh. Take, take, take. Selfish cunt.
I don't even know what to say to you anymore. But there has to be something more...
[She lifts a finger to her chin, tapping away in a mockery of Minako's thinking face. Then she turns to address the camera again, winking and grinning.]
I want to make sure all of you are witnessing this. It is very important to me that my dear self finally opens up and is honest about all of our faults. She's very protective of them, you know. So controlled. Such a perfect actress. Please, video or call or text in with your questions you're all dying to know and I'll make sure she doesn't keep any more secrets from you! You deserve better, after all, putting up with her and being her "friends"!
She would do anything for any of you! Just to make sure you'd throw her a little affection bone once in awhile! Isn't that sweet? Isn't that. Just. So. Selfless!
[She kicks Minako again, and blood starts to really pool out of her bandage onto the floor. There are obvious tear tracks on her face when the shadow lifts her up again, holding her shoulders to aim her at the camera.]
Come on, come ask all of Minako! Not just the pathetic perfect hero she pretends to be!
no subject
The entire display sickens him. At least his shadow kept everything to themselves, a simple tussle in the kitchen and a few episodes of lashing out at his friends. None of it on the network. None of it where so many could see.
But he understands it at the same time. The desire to simply scream one's self loathing out from the rooftops instead of keeping it inside all the time. The burning ache at the thought that you'll never be loved, or worse, never have enough love.
And oh how Minako loves. So much of her very being is the constant need to love everyone around her while asking for so very little in return.
Rin may be stupid as hell most of the time but he can smell a foul game from a mile away. This thing doesn't want heroic demands or angered statements.
It wants truth.
The same as what his wanted, and he failed to give it, which resulted in so many he cared about getting hurt.
Maybe this time he can actually keep her from further hell.
Clenched teeth, clenched fists, deep breath in, out.
Finally, a question.]
I have a question.
What do you really think of me, Minako.
no subject
Now there's a sight for sore eyes. Look, self, it's Rin-Rin! Just the cure for what ails you, hmm? But he even wants to play the game! Even your replacement best friend wants to know the truth about you!
[The shadow cackles, but doesn't do more to harm Minako. Minako shakes.]
How can you not thirst for the truth, after all? Especially with a girl like this, who hides all her true feelings behind a fakey fake smile! Well, Rin Okumura, you came to the right place, if you want to know that!
Let's start with how you're totally a stand-in for her best friend from home! I mean, we liked you at first because you fed us-she's totally like a dog it's pathetic- but then we got to know you and there was juuuuust enough about you that reminded her of her bro Junpei, isn't that right self? The sidekick of our grand adventure! Left behind when we chose to die! Like we have room to regret that!
She was so mad at first, that Ozuma would make her be alive again, make her fight another war against shadows, and without her precious, special friends! So she just had to find little puppet replacements! [She makes Minako dance around by holding her shoulders. Minako won't look at the camera.]
She tries to tell herself we see you as the brother we always wanted and never had... but that's how she thought of Junpei, too! As if we could hide that from ourselves... as if that could ever really keep anyone in the "friend zone". We're just too desperate for that! Even when the boy is already spoken for!
[She rolls her eyes.]
She should have known better than to make you dance with her. She falls in love so easily when she's dancing, and you were so cute... [Her voice drips sarcasm.] But of course we're so talented at convincing ourselves that we can pretend all of our affection is totally innocent, so it isn't like you need to take pity on her or anything. She isn't totally desperate for your approval and affection all the time or anything. Except she totally is.
[She isn't even addressing Rin anymore, now.]
How selfish do you have to be? Getting so attached to both brothers? Just desperate! Pathetic! Throw your love at anything and hope it sticks long enough for you to forget you feel empty!
[She wasn't totally done with your question, Rin, but she got distracted.]
no subject
Inside, though, he's already preparing a reply that he's certain will at the very least shock the shadow. Was this supposed to bother him?
Shadow!Minako, you don't know Rin as well as you might think.
Still, he can tell it's not over yet, and every minute he keeps this thing talking is another minute that the real Minako is spared from being tortured further.]
That it?