solnet | GAME START!

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GAME START!

[For a kid who's pretty much constantly sauntering about shooting people creepy grins and running off their mouth, Chara seems fairly relaxed, this feed. Could be the fact that they're in the library. Or perhaps it's just a nice day outside.]

Would you like to play a game, fellow foot soldiers?

[Or maybe it's the fact that they're making a mildly off-kilter Saw joke, whatever.]

The past few weeks, I've noticed when talking to others that even the most unassuming words can have significantly different meaning; mark me curious. So here's the rules;

Each of us will have our turn in choosing a word. Perhaps this word has no real meaning to us, or perhaps it does.

The receiver of said word goes on to define it; either in a social...or personal context. Then they also pick a word to be defined. And thus the cycle continues until one of us gets bored.

[A bright smile, and the camera swings wildly askew as it's holder reaches over the side of the lounge for another book.]

I'll even start it off. Your word, is 'monster'.

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[They do eventually pick it up, corners of their eyes crinkling in an attempt to stifle their amusement.

Eyes are the windows to the SOUL, huh? In their case, that's probably true. Chara's almost tempted to ask him what he sees there.]

Apologies. Most of that would be pertinent to where I come from, as well. A little bit of LOVE, and a SOUL can do just about anything.

Even have a bad time.

[Their pitch changes, on the last. It's the voice of a child making fun of someone, definitely.]

[Wade might not be able to get a good gauge of what's inside Chara's soul-- little kids are harder to read due to his inherent bias-- but Wade definitely knows when a nerve has been struck. Interesting. This conversation gets more intriguing by the minute.]

I guess you're right. Love does conquer all, or so they say.

[He hasn't forgotten that it's his turn in this little word association game.]

Friendship.

It certainly does.

[And boy oh boy, do they sound chipper about that. Right up until he gives them his word- and they actually falter. It's only for a moment, but still; thought has to go into this answer.]

Mutual like...trust in someone else. I guess.

[They don't actually know, honestly. Their 'friendship' didn't end well for either party involved.]

Hunger.

[Spoken like someone reading from the dictionary rather than one who's experienced it themselves. Coupled with what Chara said about family being fleeting... Wade doesn't have the most optimistic picture of the kid's life right now. He doesn't say anything, of course-- that would most likely incite offense at being pitied. Kids are much smarter than many adults give them credit for, after all, and they don't take kindly to being patronized.

Instead he focuses on the word he's been given-- a rather appropriate word, given the circumstances.]

A companion. Someone you have with you your entire life. You can drive it away with a good meal every once in a while, but it always comes back. One of the only things of yours that does come back, really.

...Are you hungry now?

Edited 2016-04-21 02:01 (UTC)

[It's funny how those implications just keep rolling in. Funnier still how often people miss them- and absolutely terrifying when they don't.

They could potentially have issues with his definition, as well. Forty-three resets technically counts as forty-three days; the amount of LOADs in between not included. Frisk had gotten hungry, sure. But Chara hadn't.

Not for food, at least. They have to wonder; is he even speaking about food?]

...Why do you ask?

[The reservation sets back in. Mark them mildly suspicious.]

[Sounds like this kid might be getting a little stranger danger. Not that Wade blames them, really-- he's just a random dude in a weird outfit that showed up at the castle one day. One freely given apple is not enough to prove his intentions.

But he still can't resist the urge to be coy about it.]

No fair answerin' a question with a question, kiddo. Why don'cha answer mine first an' I'll answer yours.

[A huff of breath, easily picked up as static. The irritating part of this is, they really want to know what's up his sleeve- or in his glove, whatever.

Which means playing by his rules, even if only for a moment.]

...I suppose. Now answer my question.

[There we go. There's a smug smile in Wade's voice as he replies.]

Aww, man. I'd love to answer your question, kiddo, but I'm not ready yet. Wanna stop by the kitchen in about... ten minutes? Pretty sure I'll have the answer for ya around then.

[That is definitely cheating. Chara gives him an extremely sour look before cutting the feed completely- there's a few jokes they could make here, about stranger danger and all the nasty things people get rather uncomfortable about.

But things like that don't phase this one. And Chara can't avoid the fact that they're both curious...and frustrated. He's not giving them enough to go off.

So, ten...fifteen minutes later, they approach the kitchen with care.]

[Wade's singing can clearly be heard as Chara ventures closer to the kitchen. Towards the end of his tenure in Haven, he'd rarely been in the mood for singing, and for a while, it seemed as though that happy little habit had been crushed out of him along with what remained of his optimism. Amazing what a few full-course meals and a good night's sleep in a warm bed could do for you. (Now if he could only stop the night terrors, everything would be just fine.)]

♪Who can it be knockin' at my door?
Make no sound, tiptoe across the floor
If he hears, he'll knock all day
I'll be trapped and here I'll have to stay~♫

[At least he has a good voice? There's a sudden clattering noise, and Wade briefly interrupts his song to address an unknown person in the kitchen.]

I've done no harm, I keep to mys-- wait a minute, Tibs. I know it looks delicious, but we can't dig in just yet. Gotta wait for our guest, y'know?

[The voice that replies is unintelligible but no less admonishing.] Cubone! Bone!

I know, darlin'. But patience is a virtue. Tell ya what-- I'll give you an extra big piece if you can be a good girl and wait just a little while longer, okay?

[...They know that song. Not well enough to sing the lyrics, but there's recognition there regardless; something that they might have heard on the radio, once, something someone was playing when they'd passed by.

Chara almost turns around and walks away

but curiosity kills, doesn't it? It's that second voice that attracts their attention, and almost cautiously, they round the doorway, blinking at the...skull wearing monster for a moment. Ah...

For lack of anything to really say, they make a polite cough for attention. The demon that comes when you cook it...things?]

[Tibia sees the intruder before Wade does, and she urgently tugs at his pant leg, pointing in Chara's direction with her bone. Wade's eyes lock briefly with the child's before he... sinks below the counter with a shifty expression. Tibia, not to be outdone, does the same after a few looks from Chara to Wade. The refrigerator door opens briefly, and then closes again.

After a few seconds, Wade starts singing again-- humming, rather-- and it's a song that everyone who's been exposed to human culture should know by now. At the same time, something comes rising from under the counter, lifted by Wade's own two hands.

It's a pie. A chocolate pudding pie, to be exact-- freshly chilled from the refrigerator and topped with a healthy serving of whipped cream. Still mostly hidden, Wade slides the pie across the counter in Chara's direction, allowing the child to bask in awe at its perfect design before finally rising behind his cover, triumphantly singing the last few notes with enthusiastic flourish. Please, hold your applause.]

[What the hell are they supposed to do with this?

The scary thing is, Chara doesn't know. They legitimately don't know what their response is supposed to be, genuine surprise adorning their expression as the man dips down and the... Tibia, he called them, follows. It's a sight.

It's a sight coupled with music that any human would know, turning the entire scenario into something laughable. Completely beyond expectation. They could run through every sharp memory in their arsenal, and there'd be nothing like this. Absolutely nothing.

The noise that escapes them, before they put their hand to their mouth. That's laughter.]

[And there's still a smile curling up behind their knuckles as he administers a rather brilliant finale, one that slips a little at what is actually presented. Chocolate. Or pie.

Preferably both.

Life, they've come to find, is often like a chessboard. The game has changed here, but it's still chess. The only difference is that they're toying with the white pawns, instead of the black. But this?

Wade presents a pie, and it's like he's just tossed a dozen pieces of checkers on the board. Added the spinning wheel from a twister game, and called it fair. Then slapped a chocolate pie down for good measure.]

You can't possibly have made it that quickly. [Says the skeptic. In a rather strangled tone. All it takes is a glance Tibia's way (who's copying Wade with so much zest it's awe-inspiring) before they're turning their head away to cough.

Certainly sounds like even more laughter.]

[Chara may have implied that they were more sinister than they appeared to be, but Wade knows an infectious laugh when he hears one. It may have been choked down too early to really amount to anything, but it was a laugh, plain and simple, and Wade is simultaneously tickled, endeared and encouraged by it. He rubs Tibia's head roughly from where she's climbed up onto the counter (she closes her eyes briefly in delight at her human father's praise) before addressing Chara's accusation.]

That's my secret. I've got spooky scary pie powers. [Said with an accompanying waggling of fingers, which Tibia also enthusiastically imitates.] The only way to stop it from gaining sentience and possessing someone is to eat it up quick. Hurry! I think I just saw it move!

[Tibia, loyal little assistant that she is, immediately gives the counter a whack with her bone to make the pie dish tremble slightly, immediately shoving the bone behind her back and adopting an innocent expression in case Chara should decide to look at her. Wade, to his credit, does not laugh at this. It's a monumental effort.]

Edited 2016-04-26 01:08 (UTC)

[Oh, this has to stop. Chara straightens, attempting to find some composure; but their smile isn't shifting as it's directed Tibia's way- they saw that.

Gaining sentience and possessing someone. Looks like they have a lot in common with this pie.]

Then by all means- [They skirt the counter for a moment, a moment's pause before they turn their back to Wade, go for the drawer they know so well. Out comes a knife; hopefully Wade can prepare the plates.]

It's time to foil this nefarious fiend.

[Even as a mercenary, whose entire career is designed to exploit every possible weakness available, Wade doesn't understand the significance of Chara turning their back to him. How could he? For all intents and purposes, Chara seems like a regular kid. He unwittingly rewards this secret test of character by turning his back on them as well, reaching up to the cupboards to get out some plates before turning back around to set them on the counter.]

You wanna do the honor of exorcising this bad boy? It's your pie.

[Do they? Well...

They already have the knife. And it's with a very solemn ~~and dramatic~~ air that they raise it high over the pie itself, the room filled with as much unnecessary tension as an eleven year old can provide.]

The power of Christ compels you. [They tell the pie. The knife comes down.

The pie tyranny is over.

And whilst the portions they cut out for themself and Wade are mostly even...Tibia gets a little more. Bias is as bias does.]

[So it's to be that way, is it? Well... two can play at that game. When Chara makes the initial incision, an otherworldly shrieking, burbling noise erupts from the pie-- okay, so the sounds are coming from Wade, but still. He suddenly darts forward, grabbing the pie tin with both hands and struggling with it in an attempt to keep it grounded.]

It's tryin' to get away! [Said in between those painful, nightmarish sounds.] Do it, kid! Kill it once and for all!

Bone! Bone! CUBONE! [Tibia adds her own two cents to the scene, slamming her bone down into her other hand in an imitation of a fatal strike.]

[A few more well-placed cuts with the knife, and the sounds fade into pained gurgles, quickly becoming silent. Wade cautiously lets go of the tin, rising from his position and wiping his brow with a sigh of relief.]

Think it might be over, kiddo. You did good. [His voice suddenly adapts a sinister tone that Vincent Price would have been proud of.]

Now to feast on its juicy insides.

[He'll be pleased to note that this time, the laughter comes free and easy. He makes it harder to cut, but that's not even an issue that crosses their mind. So the pieces that come out are a little wobbly. And maybe the remnants of the pie (what little hasn't been dished out onto their plates) has a few unnecessary stab wounds-

Chara's too exhilarated to notice.

This isn't someone pushing Chara into their idea of fun. It's matching up with them; meeting on an equal ground and picking up their morbid little line, taking off running.

It's never happened before.

None of this has ever happened before.

And the grin aimed his way is one of positively evil delight, running a finger down the flat of the blade to scoop up most of the goopy, juicy insides that remain on it-]

And to the victors go the spoils.

[And popping it into their mouth.

Suffice to say, it's incredibly satisfying.]

[The smile Chara has on their face now probably would have disturbed anyone else, and indeed, it is a bit unnerving even to Wade. But Wade has had a history with troubled children like these. He'd managed to talk down a mutant child who possessed explosive telekinetic powers that only came about when he was stressed out (and he was stressed out nearly all the time). He'd befriended another child with the ability to predict the future, a child whose mutation had deformed his face so hideously that his father kept him sheltered from the outside world, fearing that civilization would make his son a pariah.

Wade's even somehow made friends with the child who would one day grow up to destroy the world, and his dedication to the safety of that child caused him to miraculously avert his world's dark future as they knew it. Wade may be a heartless killer motivated solely by money, but when it came to children-- regardless of their background, species, or level of violence-- all bets were off.

Besides, Chara's cute when they laugh.

Wade laughs in kind, lifting his mask up over his mouth before stabbing his fork into a piece of the pie's desiccated corpse and popping it into his mouth with relish.]

Mmn. Nothin' like the taste of suffering, right? Must be why burgers are so good.

Nobody can resist the temptation of mashed up cow.

[Ground up beef would be the more appropriate term- but who's looking to be appropriate? Neither of them seem remotely put off from their food. Once Chara's done cleaning the knife, it's time to start on their own slice. They don't even give Wade's mouth and chin a second glance.

Been there, seen that. The shape and variety of monsters doesn't leave Wade's complexion as something for fascination; just another confusing indicator that he can't be quite human.

He's not, they've decided. He's very firmly not a human.]

But if you want true suffering, you have to cook crab. Apparently, the best way to do so is to boil them alive.

And they scream, too.

[Wade laughs at that, scooping up another gelatinous forkful of pudding filling and stuffing it into his mouth with no sign of hesitation or disgust. Kid's got quite the dark sense of humor, but he likes that. Those were the types of kids that grew up to be scientists or morticians, people who took things apart to find out what makes them tick-- or to find out what happens when they stopped ticking. As someone who has, quite literally, flirted with Death, he's nowhere near qualified to judge.]

Hate to disappoint you, kid, but crabs don't scream. Got no vocal cords-- no use for 'em when you're livin' in the ocean, y'know? It's just the hot steam blasting through their shells makin' that screamin' noise, that's all.

The other part's true, though. They would probably scream if they could. I mean, hell-- I've nearly been boiled alive, so I'll be the first to tell you that anyone who tells you crabs don't feel anything when you boil 'em is spouting a bunch of Grade-A bullshit.

[Close enough to the truth, honestly. If they'd lived..they probably would have become a politician. Perhaps not so much in the business of taking things apart as holding someone together, working out what made people tick for the mere purpose of keeping them happy.

Making them leave him alone.]

That's a pity. [And they wholeheartedly mean that, manners stopping them from speaking until they've taken a mouthful and swallowed it. He has their interest, though.] What was that like? I can't say being boiled comes under my field of experience.

Hmm.

[Wade pauses mid-bite of another piece of pie, his brow furrowing thoughtfully as he tries to come up with a definitive answer. Finally he shrugs, shoving the forkful into his mouth and speaking around a mouthful of pudding.]

A lot worse than bein' digested, lemme tell you. You'd think it'd be the other way around, but once the acid eats away the second epidermis, the pain just kinda ebbs a little as you start to go into shock. It's actually too much pain for your brain to handle, which... I guess is kinda ironic.

Boiling, though-- that takes it to a whole new level. 'Cause your skin stays mostly intact-- mostly-- it's what's inside you's gettin' cooked. You basically become your own personal crock pot for your organs. No bueno. Plus at least with digestion, there's a way out, know what I'm sayin'?

[Should he be telling these things to a kid? Probably not. But hey-- they've already established themselves as being firmly on the dark and morbid side of things. Plus, they asked.]

GAME START!

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1/2 oh my god I'm still rolling

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