And They All Lived "Happily" Ever After.

[achievementhunter]

Greetings, fellow soldiers.

[The feed opens up to a view from the very edge of the bridge. Slim legs dangling over the edge, at the very precipice of everything.

It's a nice day today. The water's sparkling. A light breeze has small waves kicking up on it's surface, barely distinguishable from the quality of the video format. Even so- it's pretty.]

It's been a while since our last game. I'm sure most of you are busy with the flurry of activity this month has sparked, however- indulge me for a few minutes.

Consider it a question, more than a game.

What would a 'happy ending' look like, to you?

Comments

[havesomedeath]

Hm. Do you mean like... in general? Like a happy ending to life?

[achievementhunter]

However you want to interpret it, but yes.

[Let's go with that ideal.]

[havesomedeath]

Oh, that's easy then! I want a really gruesome, painless death!

[...

Yeah.]

[achievementhunter]

[...Oh.

Well in that case, Chara's just going to turn the camera back on themself. That sure is a smile, right there.]

How, though? Spontaneous combustion? Something ripping you to pieces in brute strength? Biting your head off?

[havesomedeath]

Oh, those are all great ways! I haven't really settled on what I want most yet. I mean, it'll probably happen in some big battle, but there's still so many possibilities.

Of course, having it be a surprise is way more fun, but it's still nice to think of the possible horrible, bloody details!

[achievementhunter]

Well you have to think about it a little, surely. How else to you ensure it's as horrific as possible? You don't want someone to stick you with a sword and leave you disappointed.

[havesomedeath]

I dunno, you can get a lot of mileage out of a good stabbing if it's in the right spot! Depending on where it hits, it can cause a lot of blood loss and that'd be really pretty.

And if it's too boring, well, I can probably get one big curse out before I go. Y'know, make it a little more exciting.

[achievementhunter]

Oh? Well what kind of curse would be good enough to fit an ending? Impress me.

[havesomedeath]

Hm, well. Obviously it'd have to be a death curse, that goes without saying. Y'know I can kill someone all the way across a battlefield with one of those? But taking down just one other person seems a little small, right?

I've always wanted to try taking down an entire army that way. I bet I could pull it off.

[This is one of those things he's absolutely worked on. Not that it's something he could test out here, of course.]

[achievementhunter]

An entire army?

[They look positively delighted. Other worlds are so thrilling, sometimes.]

You really think you could pull off something with that area of effect? How?

[havesomedeath]

It's really just the same as any other death curse, I'd just have to increase the power a hundred times. It'd take a lot outta me, but hey, I'd be dying anyway, so what do I care?

It's pretty theoretical for now, but I've been working on it a bunch. I'm also working on something to make the actual dying part easier too.

[achievementhunter]

Something to make the actual dying part easier?

I'm intrigued. If it's not something you'd consider, private, please, indulge me further. How does one make the 'actual dying part easier'?

[havesomedeath]

It's a death curse, but a really specific one. Basically, as soon as someone is fatally injured, the curse kills them right away. So bam, instant painless death! No nasty suffering involved.

That's the idea, anyway.

[achievementhunter]

Well then.

Would you like a test subject, for this? I'd be more than amenable to offering my services.

[justribbing]

[ You have got to be freaking kidding him. ]

'Fraid somebody's gotta put the brakes on this one.

[ Next, let's say hi to the resident dark mage. ]

Heya, Henry. Howzitgoin'?

[achievementhunter]

Oh, I'm sorry. You were invited...when, precisely?

[And screw you right back, buddy chum pal.]

[justribbing]

Y'know, this is pretty rich.

All that effort to reassure your mom. Whaddya call this?

[achievementhunter]

I call it helping someone out with some fairly respectful and intuitive research.

If I'd already be dying anyway, there's no harm to her past what's already there.

[havesomedeath]

Oh! Hey-o, Sans!

Did you wanna be included in the conversation? Cause that's just fine with me!

[Totally casual about the sudden interruption. Like they weren't just talking about death curses.

...Or more like that's just how he is about death curses. And other death-related things.]

[justribbing]

[ It's kinda disturbing how cavalier he is about it, but. Hey. It's only ever his problem when he decides it is, and-- ]

Hate to interrupt your bonding, but I don't think you should take that experiment offer too seriously. Don't see it workin' out in anybody's favor.

[havesomedeath]

Ha ha, you think so? I mean, this kind of experiment isn't really... uh...

[How does he... put this?]

It's not really made for volunteer testing?

[To be honest, he's just a little weirded out.]

[havesomedeath]

Uh, ha ha, well... I can't say that's the kind of offer I've had before.

[Also, combined with the sudden interruption from Sans, this sure got... strange...]

[achievementhunter]

I'll speak to you about it more later. Mother dearest gets cranky when he thinks I'm starting to do A Violence.

[Skeletons these days, amirite?]

[havesomedeath]

Oh, well... sure, okay! Ha ha, I know the type. I used to have people hovering over me, keeping me in check, all the time!

[And while they probably did stop him from killing himself by doing something stupid numerous times, he has to admit they never had to stop him from doing something quite like... this.

Boy, Chara sure is interesting.]

[achievementhunter]

It's still rather new to me, but I can commiserate.